Big Babies and Relationships

Happy Monday!  I hope everyone had a great weekend.  I spent most of mine cleaning and moving!  I think I may have outdone myself yesterday with all the moving b/c my body is pretty sore today.  Hopefully I didn't strain my baby.... I had a doctor's appt last week where I had the Glucose Challenge Test.  I was a little worried about it but everything turned out fine and I don't have gestational diabetes!! No shots for me!  I also found out that I am measuring a few centimeters ahead of schedule.  They say your tummy measurements closely relates to your pregnancy week.  I was at 28 weeks and I measured 31 centimeters.  The midwife said that the myth is truth, give or take 2 cm, so I'm not that far off.  I wonder if this will affect my due date? Everyday I learn something new about my relationship with Bill.  I'm trying to find that consistent balance of when to get angry, when to let things go, when to cry, when to laugh, etc.... and it's difficult.  I always thought that all the hooplah everyone talked about in reference to getting married was because they either weren't trying hard enough or just didn't care.  I thought that I would be different b/c I care enough to work on the relationship.  But ya know what.... a relationship isn't one sided.  You have to deal with another personality.  One that grew up in a different environment, different culture, different way of doing things, with different perspectives.  Sometimes one will care more then the other.  Sometimes we forget all the promises we made b/c there's so many you have to make during the course of your relationship.  How can you tell when you're making too many compromises or not enough? Being in a marriage is no joke!  I'm a very cautious person.  I want to know that I am about to get hurt before I get hurt.  I want to know what's going on before it happens.  I take life seriously and everything is a big deal.  Bill, on the other hand, dives head first into everything.  He's all about the here and now.  So where do you find that healthy balance???

Elegance and Bunnies

Hello again!  So we are at 27 weeks today!  Only 13 more to go :)  Bill and I are getting things done in preparation for the little one.  We signed the lease, bought a couch, will pick out paint colors this weekend and plan on having the carpets cleaned again.  That might all sound boring to you all but I find it exciting!  I'm somewhat of an old soul ....Pregnancy is going awesome so far.  I must admit I've had it pretty easy.  I haven't really been sick, just tired at times. I've been better about trying to keep active.  Hopefully it will make for a fairly easy (I use that term loosely) delivery.  So I've been watching this new show called The Playboy Club.  Caroline, the Mother Bunny, is very elegant and beautiful.  She has a presence that commands everyone's attention.  She is a bit insecure which is odd but kind of reassuring to me to know that a woman of that caliber can still be insecure but I guess we all are to some degree.  When I was watching Mad Men, I was drawn to Joan, the red-headed secretary.  She walked around with confidence that I envy soooooo much.  Anyways, I would absolutely love to have the confidence and elegance as these two ladies, BUT I am torn between someone who I envy and who I truely am.  I think of myself as pretty plain.  I don't wear a lot of makeup and I don't really do much (ok, I don't do anything!) with my hair.  I don't get regular manicures, pedicures, facials, or any of the other womanly grooming habits.  I swear, burp, make funny faces, and yes, I am admitting to the world, sometimes (well more then sometimes)...... I fart.  So the thought of ever being "elegant" doesn't really seem that fesible.  But yet, I still envy these woman and want to be like them.  So, what's a girl to do???????

Feelings, Protein, and TV Shows

Hello again.  I hope you all are having a pretty awesome week!  The past couple of days for me haven't been a total picnic.  I've been kinda down and I'm not really sure why or where/how it started.  Maybe it's mood swings? Maybe it's my diet and exercise? Maybe it's because I haven't had my daily dose of sweet tea??   The possibilities are endless... I've had swollen hands and feet on and off over the past week and I noticed last night that my ankles are starting to swell too.  I've been trying to watch my salt intake but they still swell.  I haven't exercised like I want to or should.  We're either busy running around doing classes or I'm just too tired to make the effort.  I've tried to wake up in the morning but that's nearly impossible.  I used to be able to jump out of bed at the first alarm and now I'm on snooze 3 or 4.  We did finally sign a lease last night which just alleviated a lot of pressure on our living situation.  We have the next month to get packed, condense furniture and sell what we can.  Another thing that's been on my mind the last couple of weeks is how the first few months are going to be with the baby.  I am feeling very protective of the baby and this insane controlling urge over him.  I know that I'm not going to be the perfect mother and I'm going to make mistakes and I'm not going to know what to do all the time but I feel like that's how I'm going to learn to take care of him.  I fear that everyone is going to come in, take care of him, and then I won't know how to when they leave.  Maybe it's a fear of being detached from the baby or that he's going to love someone else more then me.  That's the scariest feeling in the world.  Does every mother go through this? Is this a childish feeling to have? Am I crazy?? I'm afraid of going back to work and leaving the baby for someone else to raise.  If the baby sees this other person for 9 hours a day and me for less then that, how will he know who his parents are? I feel like my whole way of thinking has shifted and my life is changing so fast.  This is turning out to be a very depressing entry... let's talk about something fun!  We have our birth class tonight.  We're supposed to talk about nutrition and how good nutrition is vital to a healthy delivery.  I have to write my diet and protein intake over 3 days.  Today is my third and my food lists are really long and I have no problem eating enough protein.  That's probably why this baby is growing so fast!  Bill and I are planning on going to NY over Memorial day weekend so I'm pretty excited about that too.  I was trying to look up things to do while we're there but I don't think Bill is going to want to see Central Perk or anywhere Carrier, Samantha, Charlotte, or Miranda hung out, or shopped, or had lunch ...... :)